


Badsmitten

by MakeItRay_n



Category: Carry On - Rainbow Rowell
Genre: Cute, Fluff, M/M, puns
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-11
Updated: 2017-01-11
Packaged: 2018-09-16 18:06:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,577
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9283751
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MakeItRay_n/pseuds/MakeItRay_n
Summary: In which Simon tries to get back into Baz's good graces after a lover's spat and Penny is sexiled from the apartment after Simon's plan works.





	

“I still don’t understand why we’re doing this.”

“Because, Penny. _Because_.”

“Repeating the same word twice doesn’t tell me anything, Simon.”

“I already _told_ you. Baz and I had a fight a few days ago and now he won't talk to me.” I frowned, recalling the argument we'd had. At first Baz was just reprimanding me for the number of times I'd almost burned the apartment building down while trying to make scones. Then it had escalated into me accusing him of neglecting me. _'_ _I_ _f you weren't so busy playing dumb sports at university I probably wouldn't have to eat my sorrows away.'_ The accusation had been ridiculous, but I couldn't get over how shocked and hurt he'd looked after I said it.

“So this is your genius plan? To make a silly banner?” She asked, looking at me dubiously. “It's just a banner. Why am I even here?"

“ _Because_ —”

“You better not repeat that word twice.”

“You are here because I need a drawing to make the banner look nice and you're a better artist."

“I’m better than you at a lot of things. I still don’t see why I have to be involved.”

“Penny, you owe me!” 

“For what? I don’t remember doing anything wrong.” 

“Remember that time…”

“What time?”

“When you walked on me and Baz… you know…”

“OH MY GOD! EW! Why would you remind me of that!?”

I blushed furiously. “Yeah, well you owe me. Baz was pretty into it and he got mad when you interrupted.”

“He _liked_ that!? That looked soooo uncomfortable. Morgana, I didn’t even know a person’s legs could _twist_ like that, and don’t even get me started on what his arms were doing—Perks of being a vampire I suppose.”

“Penny!” I squeaked.

“It’s not like I’m kink-shaming you. Relax. I'll help."

“Thank you.”

I rolled the banner out on the ground, dipped the paintbrush into the bucket of blue paint and began to draw out the letters carefully. My tongue jutted out of the corner of my mouth as I concentrated. Baz would never forgive me if this didn’t look good. 

  
"Did I spell it right on my phone?" I asked, unlocking it and handing it to Penny.

"Um, Simon, doesn't Baz...?"

My head jerked up to look at her. “Doesn't Baz what?”

“No. No, it’s nothing.” She said, but I could tell she was trying not to laugh.

I started to panic. “Is my penmanship illegible? Or worse,” I gasped, standing up to look down at the banner. “Is it ugly? Oh no.”

“Relax, Simon.” Penny said and handed me back my phone. She sat on the ground, dipped a different brush into the yellow and painted a tennis ball. “I’m sure Baz will love it. He’ll probably think it’s charming and sweep you off your feet to do more of what I walked in on that other time—”

“Shh! Shh! I hear footsteps! I think Baz is coming.”

“You can tell that it’s Baz by the sound of his footsteps? I don’t know whether that’s sweet or sickening.”

“Shh! You’re done, right? Done painting, yeah? Then hurry up and help me hang it up!” I jumped up from the ground and rushed to tie the banner up to the fence. 

It was hung up and looking perfect by the time Baz had come near. He looked so good, his hair down instead of pulled back, showing off his cheekbones. He glanced at me, then at the banner, looking baffled, but amused. I turned my head to look at Penny for reassurance, but found that she had disappeared.

“Simon…” he said slowly, and I shivered because I hadn’t heard him say my name since our fight. “What is this?”

“I’m sorry about yelling at you for not spending enough time for me." I blurted. "I know how much you enjoy this new hobby of yours and I should’ve been supportive instead of immature and whiny. So I made this banner—uh, Penny helped—to show you how much I want you to be happy and stuff. I promise to go to all your matches. So, yeah...”

"That was so very eloquent of you."

I pouted. "Don't be mean."

He regarded me thoughtfully and I squirmed under his scrutiny, averting his eyes. My stomach was flipping with nervous butterflies, my hands feeling cold and clammy. I glanced up at him, wondering if I'd have to do something else to win him over. But his eyes were filled with wonder and he looked like he wanted to laugh. The sight of it made my heart beat faster.

“Do you forgive me?” I asked, giving him my best puppy dog face.

He smiled at me and held his arms open. “C’mere.”

I closed the distance between us and trapped myself in his embrace, burying my face in the crook of his neck. His skin was less cold than usual, his pulse thumping against my lips. I sighed contently against his skin, making him shiver.

“Did you really feel like I was neglecting you?” he murmured. “Because I never want you to feel like that.”

I pursed my lips to kiss his throat. “It’s not that I was feeling _neglected_ per se… I’m just used to monopolizing all your time.”

“Simon, I love you,” he says, pausing when he feels me smiling widely against his neck. “And I love spending time with you and Bunce, but I need my own friends too. Or else you and I might morph into the same person.”

“What would be so bad about that?”

“Well, I can’t have sex with myself,” he scoffed.

I giggled. “Actually—”

“Shhh. If you stop talking I'll forgive you.”

I hummed and we stood there, embracing each other for a few more blissful, wonderful seconds.

“One question though,” Baz said, breaking the silence. “Why does the banner say: _I’m badsmitten with you?”_

I blinked and pulled back just a little to look up at him. “Because that’s what the thing you whack the ball with is called…? A badminton? And I’m smitten with you. Surely, you know how puns work, Baz…”

He rolled his eyes. “Simon, I play _tennis.”_

I rolled my eyes and lowered my voice a little to mimic him. “Yes, Baz. I _know._ ”

“The ‘thing I whack the ball with’ is called a tennis racquet.”

“Oh,” I said, laughing sheepishly. No wonder Penny had snickered. And she hadn’t even bothered to correct me, the jerk. “Should I paint ‘ _My heart makes a racquet whenever I’m with you_ ’ over it?”

He shook his head. “No, that’s too long. And you probably wouldn't know how to spell it anyway..."

"What was that, dear?"

"I said you're very handsome and I'm lucky to have you."

I pushed up on my toes to plant open-mouthed kisses up his throat. His arms tightened around me, his breath stuttering with every kiss. He let out a moan when my lips landed on the space between his jaw and ear. I licked and sucked on it, my hands roaming down his waist and back up, under his shirt this time. My fingers scratched at his abdomen and he whimpered. I pulled back to whisper in his ear, making sure my lips brushed against the shell with every word.

“Do you want to try that thing we did last week?" I asked, hoping my voice came out sounding seductive. "Before Penny interrupted us?”

He shivered again and I yelped when his arms tightened around me and my feet left the ground. He threw me over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes and started to walk.

“Oh we are most definitely doing that thing,” he said, voice husky. “But this time _you’re_ —”

I stretch my arms out to dig into Baz’s back pocket. 

“Love, I’m going as fast as I can. Could you _not_ make it worse?”

“Sorry,” I pat his butt in apology before I pull out his phone and unlock it. “I just need to text Penny.” 

 

To Penny:

_don’t come back to the apartment ‘til 3 hours from now_

_-Simon_

_4:03pm_

 

From Penny:

_THREE hours??? Holy shit, get it boiiiiii_

_4:04pm_

 

From Penny:

_Micah taught me American slang btw_

_4:05pm_

From Penny:

_Simon?_

_4:15pm_

From Penny:

_You’re doing the thing aren’t you?_

_4:21pm_

From Penny:

_I hope Baz stretched beforehand!_

_4:38pm_

To Penny:

_Oh, I did the stretching, alright. But it wasn’t /my/ body parts being stretched if you catch my drift ;)_

_-Baz_

_6:57 pm_

From Penny:

_TMI BASILTON!!!_

_6:59pm_

To Penny:

_das what you get for not correcting me when I wrote a pun for the wrong sport_

_-Simon_

_7:16pm_

From Penny:

_*snickers* Well, it worked, didn’t it? You should be thanking me. I know how much Basilton gets off on you being an idiot._

_7:17pm_

From Penny:

_So are you done? Can I go back to the apartment now? It’s been three hours._

_7:32pm_

From Penny:

_Helloooooo? Simon?_

_8:08pm_

From Penny:

_Basilton?_

_8:10pm_

From Penny: 

_TYRANNUS BASILTON GRIMM-PITCH_

_8:13pm_

From Penny:

_*sigh* sexiled by SnowBaz once again_

_8:15pm_

From Penny:

_You guys owe me. You better teach me how to get my arms and legs to stretch like that. It must feel amazing if you’ve been doing it for FOUR HOURS STRAIGHT._

_8:22pm_

To Penny:

_Oh trust me, there is absolutely /nothing/ straight about what we just did ;)_

_-Baz_

_8:49pm_


End file.
